New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
