Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize
