We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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