she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
