do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
