just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
