My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
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