Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
