I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
