I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
