My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Everyone says I win the strip club
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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