i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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