At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize