This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize
