Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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