It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
