I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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