Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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