Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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