New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
