If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize