yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
