I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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