No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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