I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
