I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
