This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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