either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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