Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
