Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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