if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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