Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
i think my cat just said my name.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
