dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
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