just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
