What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
you never un-have a 4some
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
