u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
