Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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