OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
