Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
