Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
