This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
