New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
