Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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