i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
