I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
