HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Randomize
