I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
