the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Randomize
