it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Randomize
