i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
